After a very rough night in our hotel room, one where Tatiana would simply not sleep and I was completely broken as to what I could do for her besides sob and hold her. I finally got into her bed and curled up next to her until she finally fell asleep. She has completely lost the world that she has known, people that speak her language, her friends at school, a foster mom who she will talk about sometimes, and even food that is "normal" to her. I am here thinking I cannot wait to go back to the USA where I understand the language, the food, the money and the culture. That is me, and I also have an understanding of why I am here and why I can't go home. For little Tatiana I am not sure that she completely understands what is happening to her. Sure, she says that she wants to go to the United States and see "Mickey Mouse", but I think that is probably where it ends, and she is wondering when these people that are taking care of her are going to go away. It will all take time. Usually during siesta time, I will journal, blog or read, but today I actually napped, when I woke up, Tatiana was laying in her bed talking to herself again. I asked her if she wants to sleep next to Papa and she immediately crawled up next to him. I then took the computer into the bathroom where I wouldn't bother her and opened my blog. After that rough night, your comments brought tears to my eyes, thank you for taking the time to comment, it means a lot to us here, in a country, where few people understand our language.
This one here brought tears to my eyes. What poor Tatiana has gone through in her short 6 years. I am sure she doesn't understand what is going on, and the language being a huge barrier doesn't help. But in no time at all it will all make sence to her and will be greatful for everything you and Ken have done for her this far. But with you having to stay down there for this amount of time will only help you realize what the girls are going thru and will continue to face for a while yet. I will definately say an extra prayer for little Tatiana for calmness and Understanding to what is going on in her life.
ReplyDeleteLove and Prayers Kara
Saying a big prayer for you all. This picture is so awesome. Although she will have rough times in the coming months she will still feel the love that you and Ken have for her(them). This picture already shows the impact that you are having on their lives. Her Papa!
ReplyDeleteI can't even remember where I heard this but it has always stood out in my mind. Home is a little ones coccon, parents are their coccon. When life gets scary children need to be in their coccon to feel safety and security. So although maybe you feel like you aren't for sure what to do, you crawling in bed with her gave her a coccon to feel secure and her to rest. Your arms are where her comfort is at this point. Praying for you, you are an awesome mom!!Love ya! Hugs!
There will be times when all they want is to be held. Sometimes that is better than any words. You guys are terrific parents. I can see it already. I cannot imagine what is going on in their little minds. Precious children. Sometimes it is enough just being there for them and not saying anything at all. Give them hugs and kisses from us! We are praying for all of you and asking god to give everyone what they need. Be Strong. Love and Prayers Mandy
ReplyDeleteSherri,
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the new mommy club! What you're going through is not that much different from having a newborn. You and your precious baby are not very well acquainted yet and you haven't learned what all her cues are or the best way to comfort her. There are many nights I've spent feeling broken and unsure what to do for my children and all I could do is hold them. (It's possible this was the best thing or even the only thing you could have done!) If it makes you feel any better, every new mom goes through this and it does get better. You just keep loving those girls the best you know how and leave it up to God to take care of the rest. And He will. And you have TONS of people praying for you. The time will come when you will know what to do to help Tatiana, but it may come in small steps. I know you are doing a terrific job, and it sure seems like Daddy is doing good too! Love you!
Ken and Sherri: There is no fear in love. Tatiana and Kathrine are experiencing a love without end. They never knew what real love was.Anything they ever knew never lasted and ended with broken hearts. Perfect love casteth out fear. They will soon learn there is love that doesn't end. I believe God is smiling seeing two of his little angels loved and cared for. Love and Prayers,Grandma Miller
ReplyDeleteHey Sherri, I'm a little slow...so I just finally read everything. What a beautiful story you have (I have tears in my eyes writing this). I will continue to pray for you..what a beautiful family you have...children are such a GIFT! You and Ken are doing an extraordinary job getting to know your girls. Love you...Kayleen
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